Value

I 'm drawing blank,
My heart numb, my mind blurred,
Everything seems insignificant now,
Intangible is the joy I worked so hard to build,
Foundations ruin, rubble remains,

Promises I made,
Promises I broke,
Heart and mind I mend,
Only to be shattered once again,

Am I addicted to the pain?
Can joy come of this pain?
Is joy supposed to be this painful?
Perhaps everything has its value

Value I struggle to find,
In all that I do,
And in all that I say,
Of what value am I?

This I yearn to know.